


Not a Normal Brownie

by WanderingHobbit



Series: Yellow Tulips [7]
Category: Being Human (UK), The Almighty Johnsons
Genre: M/M, WinterFRE2017, hallucinating idiots, magic mushrooms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-22
Updated: 2017-01-22
Packaged: 2018-09-19 02:49:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9414677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WanderingHobbit/pseuds/WanderingHobbit
Summary: WinterFRE2017 Prompt #33: I don't think that was a normal brownie...are you flying?





	

Honestly, the idiots should have known those were dope brownies. _Olaf_ made them after all. What else did they expect? Anders couldn’t remember a time when Olaf _didn’t_ use some kind of drug as the “special ingredient” in his baking. And now his husband and youngest brother were high off their stupid asses because they had inhaled half the brownies in one sitting. Admittedly Axl was much worse off than Mitchell seeing as the Irishman could hold his drugs and alcohol far better than any of the Johnsons could what with over a century of experience, but he still wasn’t anywhere near sober. 

 

Olaf had decided on a brownie eating contest between himself and Axl and was now blissfully zoned out on the armchair in a drug-induced haze. His eyes were half-lidded and glazed over and he had a dumb smile plastered on his equally dumb face.

 

Anders sighed heavily as he dragged his hands down his face, annoyed and slightly amused by his stoned husband and brother and grandfather. Axl was rolling around on the floor, giggling for no apparent reason and Mitchell was draped over the couch, staring wide-eyed at the ceiling.

 

“You’re a bunch of idiots, you know that?” Anders said as he lightly kicked at his brother’s foot. 

 

“Andy…” Mitchell whispered.

 

“Yes, my darling housebat?” Anders made his way over to the couch and sat down next to his husband’s hip.

 

“I have something to tell you,” Mitchell said softly, turning his wide eyes from the ceiling to look at the blond.

 

“And what is that?”

 

“I don’t think that was a normal brownie.”

 

Anders snorted. “Of course it wasn’t! _Olaf_ made them, for Christ’s sake!”

 

Olaf jolted at that and blinked blearily at his blond grandson. “I resent that,” he mumbled. 

 

Anders rolled his eyes and turned back to Mitchell. “You three are high as fuck right now.”

 

Mitchell simply continued to stare at him, unblinkingly. After a few silent moments of his unnerving stare, Anders lightly slapped his cheek. “Oi! You still with me, Dracula?”

 

He didn’t think it possible, but Mitchell’s eyes widened further as he slowly pushed himself up into a sitting position. “Are you…are you flying?” the brunet asked, dumbfounded. 

 

“What the hell are you talking about, John?” Anders studied the other man momentarily before turning back to his grandfather. “What the fuck did you put in those brownies, Olaf?”

 

“Hmm? The brownies?” Olaf lazily turned his head to gaze at Anders.

 

“Yes, the brownies! What did you put in them? Axl is laughing like a madman on the floor and my husband is hallucinating!”

 

“Oh. Well, just the usual. Flour, butter, eggs,” he began ticking off the ingredients on his fingers but was interrupted by an irritated Anders.

 

“No, grandpa! What _drug_ did you put in them?”

 

“Now that is a good question,” Olaf replied, lifting a finger to point at Anders as if to say _good point._

 

“Jesus Christ, grandpa,” Anders sighed again. He then turned his attention back to Mitchell who was still staring at him with a horrified expression on his handsome face. 

 

Suddenly, Mitchell lunged at Anders, wrapping his arms tightly around his waist and burying his face into the shorter man’s shirt. “Please don’t fly away, Andy,” his voice came out muffled through the fabric. 

 

“I’m not flying, idiot,” Anders said softly, carding his fingers through Mitchell’s curls. 

 

“Anders, why are you flying?!” Axl yelled from the floor. He stumbled up onto his knees and clutched at Anders’ pants tightly. 

 

“What the hell, Axl?” Anders shouted back, turning his upper body as much as his husband allowed so he could look back at his youngest brother. 

 

“Don’t leave me,” Mitchell whined, clutching at the blond tighter than he was previously. 

 

“I’m not going anywhere! Seriously, what the fuck were in those brownies?!”

 

The combination of Mitchell pulling at him and Axl tugging him down caused Anders to lose his balance and topple over onto the floor. Mitchell ended up half on top of him and Axl pulled himself out from under Anders’ stunned body and threw himself over his older brother’s upper torso.

 

“We’ll save you, bro!” Axl declared loudly. 

 

“Get off of me, you idiots!” Anders tried pushing and shoving at the two larger bodies lying on top of him but he couldn’t get either of them to budge an inch. 

 

Meanwhile, Olaf was still lounging on the armchair and gazing at the scene before him, but not really taking anything in. The shouting of his family and the subsequent crash of the three men falling to the ground in a heap had no effect whatsoever on Olaf’s blissed out state. 

 

Anders continued to struggle against his brother and his husband and the two refused to release him from their grasp. “Would the two of you let me go already? I’m not fucking flying!”

 

Olaf suddenly jerked out of his daze and shouted, “Mushrooms!”

 

Anders stilled. “What?”

 

“That’s the special ingredient in the brownies! Magic mushrooms!” Olaf seemed very pleased with himself for having solved the mystery of the drugged brownies. 

 

“Olaf, you fucking wanker, why did you put _magic mushrooms_ in the fucking brownies?” Anders asked, confused and appalled. 

 

“Because it’s fun,” his grandfather answered before allowing himself to slip back into his drug-induced haze, one arm hanging limply off the side of the chair. 

 

“Worthless old druggie,” Anders muttered to himself. A snore startled him and he looked back down and realized that both Axl and Mitchell had fallen asleep, still lying on top of him and clutching at his clothes in an attempt to hold him down and prevent him from taking flight. Anders sighed and let his head fall back, accepting the fact that he wouldn’t be moving anytime soon. “I’m surrounded by idiots.”


End file.
